she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
so let's talk penis.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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