she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize