woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Randomize