I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
