oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize