So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Randomize
