"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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