ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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