Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
