O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
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