butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Randomize
