I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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