I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize