Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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