I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize