we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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