why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
