i don't plan on having that self control this summer
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
