After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
