I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
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