My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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