Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
