I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
