yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize
