I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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