girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
