Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
