Do vagina's smell?
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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