Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
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