i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize