Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Randomize
