So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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