Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
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