im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
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