Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.