Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
