We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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