I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
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you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
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I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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