kristin has been a bad kristin
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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