I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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