Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
