come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
