it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
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