It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Randomize
