my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
