Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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