I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize