Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
i need to put some appletini on your dick
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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