mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
