i was rollin on her like bob the builder
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
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